Finding a Voice, "And So The Tower Falls..."

Dear Reader,


I would first like to say "Thank You" for the events of this past weekend which have led me to reflect on the life which I had been given. Certainly this may sound cliche, but to be honest I'm not writing to be original, nor to please the cynical. It doesn't come naturally to me either, and sometimes I strain myself to write down whatever it is I need to say; if only to frame the thoughts which would otherwise cause me headaches and more social awkwardness. You understand right? So here I am, writing a letter saying "Thank You" for my voice. As insignificant, humble, erratic, and human as it is, it exists because of You.


"What happened this weekend which inspired her to write this?". A birdie (my sister) texted me a picture of a piece of scratch paper on which were bullet points of blog topics. Some words stood out like, "Scotland, Architecture, Traveling, Landscape, Party....". One peculiar thing hit home: "Must fit writing voice". I have a voice? Sure, I suppose it's important to have one, but I haven't developed an awareness until now. How does one speak without being judged as some self-absorbed, media and money-driven, power maniac? On the other hand, how does one speak without being seen as an underdog- reaching out to the world, shouting personal truths, and sharing his/her life as proof of existence? I care to be neither, and I'm certain there are other non-labeled voices out there. After all this, I almost wanted to pacify myself- that no matter what I said, none of it mattered and no one wanted to hear it. The human side of me said otherwise. To find a balance- first to be thankful I have one, and the other to say that if I do have a style, let others decide what it is for themselves (at least for now until I figure it out).

I suppose what really tipped me over was being able to surf on John's couch in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. The heart of, what some would call, the "Hipster Zip Code", where freedom of expression is (more or less) a way of life. How earnestly the locals wanted to express themselves was made clear in the murals layered on warehouses, rusty corrugated fences, and the army of white Apple laptops crunching binary at the Swallow Cafe. I then watched Breaking Dawn this evening, and felt the tears welling up. The book of the movie was written by a woman who put her very life and personal beliefs into it. She risked all of these things, and for what? So she could be heard, and to sustain her way of life with a constant flow of zesty paychecks? Quite possibly so. In result she positively and negatively inspired her audiences and critics. No matter how many ways we could argue for or against this, maybe we're forgetting that this is part of what we call our own "Culture".


"Culture: The arts and other manifestations of human intellectual achievement regarded collectively". Yeah, I Googled it.

Is "Culture" then what encourages us to find our voices? To feel Life again, to love, to validate that we're not crazy, to salve our headaches and social awkwardness by a simple act of creative expression? Is it to find confidence, and place ourselves in history? Raoul Bunschoten, an architect, cybernetician, author, and theorist who used to teach at the Architectural Association in London once said to me,

"When we (him and his family) go to Venice (for the Biennale), we're going to look at 'Culture'. We're going to attend an opera, see some cathedrals; and for some reason my son doesn't seem so excited about this." -Raoul Bunschoten

He was paying homage to the years of pain, dirty politics, love, and history that unfolded as Venice evolved it's culture. The city, I suppose in a way, was like a "Blog", if you could see it as a space or a platform for creative expression. In this way, he understood exactly what it meant to appreciate You for allowing him to exist, witness this "Venetian Blog", and prolong humanity's cultural cycle as an architect. It then makes me wonder: if none of us could communicate our thoughts; if these said cathedrals were never built, how quickly would we die from Your neglect dear Reader?

Before I finish this post, I've pasted an old Myspace entry dated August 17, 2007. I guess my voice already existed because at the time, I was struggling to stay alive. Life happened, and I bottled everything up until I found Myspace, an outlet, a tool for cultural expression made by You. If we all rely on each other to survive, please remember dear Reader, that I thank you for giving me my voice and allowing me to be here.

For the love of Life, Architecture, Arts, and Landscapes,
Lesley Ann


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And So The Tower Falls...


Imagine....

You've been building a tower for seven years out of stone and mortar. Each stone you place, you secure it with caution, sensitivity, and careful planning. You work on it on the hour, every hour, and every day either through your thoughts or labor. It becomes the tower of your dreams.

One day, you fall in love with this tower. You become best friends, kindred spirits. Every morning when the sun rises, it shines its beautiful stones on you, and warms your face. You no longer feel cold in its presence. It loves you back. It lets you sit on its stairs as you read books to it. You trace your fingers on each stone and feel its coarse texture, and you are thankful for its strength. Through its echos it laughs with you when you're happy.

You bring your family to see the wonderful relationship you have together. It is a pillar of strength. Each accomplishment is celebrated. You know each other's secrets and desires and you can read each other like a book.

Six years and 9 months have passed. On the 9th month, the tower feels the urge to become a castle. It wants to become a castle so it could take better care of you, shelter you, and raise a family in a proper home. It wants to grow up. You trust the tower's decision, and he contacts another architect in a far away land who specializes in castles. In order to be properly built, he must be moved to another location where there is a stronger foundation. You are sad, but you know it's for the best. The tower reassures you that nothing will happen, that in one year, the two of you will be reunited. You trust him.

The two of you share a final farewell, a hug and a kiss....

Two months pass....

The tower falls in love with that other architect, but doesn't tell her that he has someone special back at home. The architect decides that their relationship has potential, so she decides to date him, and remove the stones you have carefully placed, and replace them with new ones. In a month, he looks different, behaves differently, thinks differently. His silhouette has changed. He wants other architects to touch him, to remove his stones and place new ones in. He wants to be different, to be wild. He never thought independence was so sweet, but guilt lingered in his halls.

Close to your seven-year anniversary, you decide it would be nice to pay your tower a visit, and perhaps find a home closeby so you can see each other more often. The tower tells you on the phone several times not to come by, that he's busy and doesn't want to be bothered. You decide to come anyway, because you also want to learn how to build castles.

When you get there, you see your tower. He's different, he's emotionally unresponsive to your love. He has different stones in him. He's crumbling, but he doesn't care. He doesn't let you sit on his stairs and read books. He doesn't even shine in the morning for you. He's stoic, and you get suspicious. The next day, he tells you that he's been seeing other people. He wants to be different. He says he doesn't need you anymore. He says that since you've been gone, he's found out that he can survive on his own, that he's better. He wants to be independent......but he still loves you.......and he doesn't want to break your heart......

He says he still wants to become a castle............

What do you do?

Let's just pretend that nothing's broken,
Lesley Ann

An Oldie But Goodie: "Morning Eyeliner, Havok's Written Word, and Los Angeles: The Concrete Jungle"

Hello All,

Since I've moved back to the States from my 2-year post-graduate school trek in Edinburgh, Scotland, I've been brewing up a wealth of new articles which I'm proud to say are well in production. I'll have one up later this week which will get you up to speed with my transition back to New York. In the meantime, here's an extremely old "post-of-a-post-of-a-post" from my MySpace blog dated 2 Dec 2006. Since then, my understanding of the world, especially urban and landscape contexts, have changed...maybe dramatically. I suppose however that I've decided to post this because I find it quite interesting that almost 6 years ago I was traveling to and back from a long-term stay in Europe. The story is the same today, only I'm hoping I'm much wiser, and maybe a better writer (haha).

Maybe there's another layer of analysis to this: If the world truly runs on time, seasons, and planetary alignment, will I be having another blog such as this? A blog about change, transformation, and understanding? I'll keep an eye out. In 2018, if I'm still alive, I'll write a blog about it, and maybe, maybe, I'll live long enough to write the next one. How about you? What were you doing 6 years ago, and has your life come full-circle?

As always, please no judging or non-constructive criticism on my article and other people's comments. I would like to maintain an open and healthy dialogue amongst us readers. A humble request from an amateur blogger. =)

Love, Lesley Ann

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"Morning Eyeliner, Havok's Written Word, and Los Angeles: The Concrete Jungle"

I've just discovered this morning, as I sojourned to Mom's bedroom to use le toilet , (John was using the shower in the other bathroom) that I have a grandmother who is an English Phd and has written a book about Mom's father's side of the family tree.....sooo, we'll be taking some family photographs in the backyard this afternoon to place in her book. Mom spoke enthusiastically about this as she applied her eyeliner. You can tell she's excited when she raises her pitch while she dotes on her plans for the day. Funny...it's almost as if she's yelling at you down a hallway...but that's Mom, and that's why I love her.

Speaking of writing, I woke up around 6:45 am today and couldn't get back to sleep. I suppose I'm still in work-schedule mode- 6:45 am: wake, 7:00 am: go back to sleep, 7:30 am: shower, 8:00 am: get my ass to work pronto! Since I couldn't go back to sleep, I decided to dip into some of Davey Havok's tasty blog literature (yes, I know, I'm hooked on MySpace....ooh the agony. Blame Han ^_~). For the more 'seasoned' writers, it may not be your cup of tea. I'll leave it up to you to decide....

In retrospect, it's a charm to read his work, and I honestly believe that if he committed some time to write a novel (a biography would be splendid), it would be just as insatiable as his music. Albeit, I'm not an English major, a psychology major, nor anyone worthy of being a critic, I must say that the way he writes has an easy flow to the prose. Somehow, there's a transparency that maintains a sense of mystery and reserve that is elegantly appropriate for his position as a popular singer, lyricist, psychologist, and writer (ok, maybe more like a renaissance man)....It's a good feeling to know that he (and I'm sure for many as well) is aware of how psychologically theraputic writing is, and therefore indulges on pixelating his thoughts on the monitor...Indeed, a creative spirit. For, I believe if someone like himself were to abstain from writing, it would be like Hiroshima in the brain.

I have further resolved that, being an architect, I must follow his example and write a little of what I know in my career. I have acquiesced to Michael's suggestion to save my architectural creative energy for my portfolio (which I AM going to work on today) and take an excerpt from one of my previous Deviant Art journal entries.

If you're so inclined to learn a little bit about architecture and urbanism (actually, it's quite long) then please read the (un-edited) February 19,2006 entry below. As I leave you today, I promise I'll make an effort to be more visually restorative and post some pictures online:


DeviantArt Journal Entry
Sunday: February 19, 2006
"Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."

Dear Reader,

I'm just going to speak from the depths of my tangled mind. I don't know where to begin, nor do I know how to make this journal entry pretty. Here goes......It's been almost half a year since I've been to Deviant Art. Months traveling around Europe has been an exciting experience as well as excrutiating (as I was separated from my love for 4 months), but seeing as it may, I've survived and now I'm back in the United States....hopefully a little wiser, and with greater understanding of my built environment. For those living in Europe, I'd say you've got yourself a sweet deal for living in a country that encourages public transporation.

Los Angeles is a very pedestrian unfriendly city (as well as much of America), and using a car as a basic means of getting yourself from Point A to Point B very much segregates you from your own world and reality....I don't like it one bit. I think this keeps you away from experiencing diversity, and in some ways can encourage racism and prejudice that cities like Los Angeles suffers from on a daily basis. For example, you're stuck in your car on the 5 South during rush hour in the sweltering heat. It's been 45 minutes since you've gotten out of work and you're still stuck in your steel prison. You think it's ridiculous that you could probably get home faster by walking if the traffic keeps up. Then, an old asian female driver cuts in front of you and you break abruptly. What upsets you even more is that damn stereotype that old asian female drivers are just "naturally horrible at driving". Could it be that your anger from the traffic jam is escalated by being cut off by a minority with a stereotype that's been engrained in your mind from daily living? Should you be angry at asian drivers, or should you be angry for their actions? Could these actions be avoided if you lived closer to home? If not, then what's wrong with the urban structure of cities like Los Angeles that has caused us to work, shop, and dine so far away from home? What would the quality of our lives be like if we could choose to spend those extra hours in any way we please?

If you were in a pedestrian friendly city, where chunks of the city are like smaller more dense neighborhoods where work is just a 10 minute walk away, or at most a 10 minute train ride away, don't you think that would give you more time to enjoy the better things in life? Being an architect and an emerging urban designer, I realize these urban qualities, especially after analyzing the urban models of cities like Paris, Berlin, and Barcelona. The reason why these historical cities are so successful and have unfathonable perseverence is because of the density. They have their own ways of avoiding 'Sprawl', a term that cities like Los Angeles suffers from, because instead of growing vertically, it grows horizontally, feeding into the suburbian soils of the Valleys. Life in Europe, to me, seems to be a bit more enlightened because the average urban European spends more time outside of the vehicle walking from Point A to Point B. These individuals can enjoy the open air and burn those extra calories instead of sitting idol inhaling the exhaust and simmering heat of a traffic jam. This aspect of pedestrian transportation in the European life I greatly admire and I would like to aim towards if I ever become an urban planner or a liscened architect.

I'd rather prefer walking to the outdoor neighborhood market and go shopping down boulevards like Friedrichstrasse (Berlin), Las Ramblas (Barcelona), and Champs du Elissees (Paris), than getting stuck in block-like complexes such as shopping malls, parking structures, and K Marts. I understand that these elements can form the American way of life, and our history has made life here the way it is....It's unavoidable, and I know that it can be insulting for anyone to say that this makes American life dull, for who am I to be so biased? Coming from Los Angeles suburbia, I can see the advantages of American commercialism- Strip Malls, Grocery Store chains, and fast food restaurants- for they are important resources for society and a way of (and to make a) living.

I think there's hope for suburbia yet in terms of growth and development. Areas of densification are happening in portions of Los Angles (and LA County) such as Santa Monica 3rd Street Promenade, Colorado Boulevard- Old Town Pasadena, and smaller establishments such as The Village- Claremont. In these dense areas, there's life happening both in the day and at night and the spaces are highly desireable to just stroll and enjoy the urban fabric because it's safe. I believe that Downtown Los Angeles does not fall into this category because there is an unbalance between work and living spaces. There are more office/ work buildings than there are residential buildings on ground level, there are no grocery stores, sparce open green space (like parks), and the shopping areas and restaurants are not as successful as expected for a structurally dense area such a Downtown LA. Why is this? This is because the buildings are mostly occupied by workers outside of the city (such as the Inland Empire and Orange County areas where land is more affordable), and the people who do live in the city are the upper-working-class who retreat in sky scraper like buildings. At night, the city is deserted sans the homeless and the random vehicles that zoom down the empty streets at dangerous speeds.

If one were to look at Downtown in a different perspective, the area is so dense with empty sky scrapers that during the evening, the ground floor transforms into a hazardous zone because the pedestrian level in Los Angeles is known to be home for those can't afford to live in expensive apartments and own vehicles- that which physically segregates the upper working class and impoverished. In that sense, "No one walks in LA." As for the upper-working-class, they spend their evenings either at home entertained with their desktops and/or cable televisions, or they're out in their vehicles stuck in evening traffic trying to get to places that ARE safer at night such as Hollywood, Santa Monica, and Pasadena, area where there is more safety in large numbers.

Taking this into perspective, the American model of an urban environment versus the European model is quite underdeveloped. Europe obviously has had more time to develop and densify itself over the last thousands of years with history to back up its culture, as opposed to America where we've only had the last 200 years to really have an opportunity to become the power we are today (with Los Angeles in particular, that's only had the last 100 years to develop into what it is now). Taking this into account that I am an architect and an aspiring urban planner, I could see there is much work to be done for the identity of America as being the country of the future. How can architects, urban planners, and engineers lead America to becoming better than it is now? What are their responsibilities? What are potential solutions to some of our vehicle/pedestrian issues? How do we make the average American walk again? One thing is for sure, I am not going to overlook these issues and design a building just so that it looks cool and is a self-actualization of my ego. That is selfish and unrealistic, for no building can be successful if it's designed because I simply "...wanted it to look that way.", "Bigger is better", and because "I think it's better that way." I am going to design according to sustainability, and that which will persevere throughout history and give a sense of identity in the community it connects itself with. Traveling abroad has taught me these values- that going back to the historical lands of civilization will teach us where humanity has made mistakes and where humanity has been successful. Then, we must take it back to America as a second chance to improve and create that balance we all strive for.


Thank you and much love,
Lesley Ann

Is this what I LOVE?

Imagine...

"It's like breathing underwater", she said to herself as she curled up in the sunny corner of the room. The timber floorboards radiated heat, and it felt like being enveloped in the palm of someone's hand. She felt small. The space swam with people, and scents; the yellow beams cut through the tall, breezy clerestory windows. It was a wedding reception. All was a blur and nothing concrete can be said about the laughter and the stories which passed that day. She was in her own mind; it was warm. She was happy to be small...as long as she was there.

Being small was part of her life. She did this every day, pulling sleighs to and from the fishing docks. Every load felt heavier and as each day went on, her team mates would pull less...always less. It was her nature to do more, and always more. She felt obligated to, like there was no other way; because she knew that it had to get done. How else would her masters eat? How would her family eat? "Do it for everyone else", they said. She was raised this way- to swallow every emotion which came to surface- because if it came through she would get whipped. It was always this way. Get angry and get punished. So she kept working, never stopping...always pleasing.

Last winter, the harbor edges froze and the boats arrived in large waves. The steady flow of shipments soon became congested, and loads of cargo had to be pulled in sprints by all the teams. At times they would wait for hours, and for others they had to pull large shipments without stopping. There was always more to do. Their feet dragged through the darkness, and they lost themselves a little more each trip.

It was on the 28th haul that her breathing became shallow; like trying to breathe underwater. Why couldn't she will herself to move? Why was there a sharp pain in her chest?

"Just a little more, a little further...I love you, you're almost there. Then you can rest", she said to herself. Something released in her, like an explosion in her chest; and something warm poured inside. That night she was dragged the rest of the way.

Maybe she wasn't meant for this life. But if she had a choice, where would she go, and what would she do? She served her time and she fought for those who depended on her. Though nothing was given back, she still loved them. With everything she had, she still loved them....and despite this, she didn't want to give up. She wanted to live, but for what? For whom?

Time is healing...


The space was warm with the spring air which carried the scent of jasmine, lavendar, and burning candles. It was crowded with tables filled with guests and a course of entrees, carefully selected by the bride. There was joy, atmosphere, and relief from the passing winter. A bright light pierced through the clerestory windows and pushed onto the floorboards under the sleeping animal at the corner of the room. No one saw her there, and in their hearts she didn't exist. But in hers she remembered everyone. She waited paitiently to be called, while resting in the palm of the sunlight which filled that space.



Love,
Lesley Ann

In Progress....

Dear Reader,

Among many things, here's something I'm currently working on- a painting/collage for my Major Design Project.

In this I'm having a dry run with textures, toning, settings, etc...I'm adding more layers, and there definitely will be people, birds, plants, more textures, text, leaders, and accreting mud. The painting is meant to portray the layering of systems which are existing and proposed on the project Site, which I'm still struggling to name (maybe "Lea Valley Gateway Park, or the Lea Valley Regional Park Junction...).

The existing elements are the overpasses, the canalized river, the mud, the pylons, cranes, and railway tracks. My intervention is the idea of "stitching" these systems horizontally in the site using boardwalks; it is to re-connect the pedestrian paths on both sides of the river. It's also vertically "stitching" the layers, using the structural supports of the boardwalks which are equipped with light pylons. The vertical structures function in two other ways. They act as agents, encouraging the growth and regeneration of the salt marsh habitat which existed prior to the River Lea's canalization. The pylons are also equipped with audio, video, motion sensors, and free wireless internet for security and research purposes. As part of the package, there are outlets and frames on which experimental interactive technology can be attached and plugged in. The site exists within the Thames Digital Gateway (like the Silicon Valley), as well as the Green Enterprise District (where renewable energy research is encouraged). Therefore, these two other systems (IT and renewable energy) can work simultaneously on site.

When all of these systems interact with each other, there is a richness of transportation and pedestrian movement, biodiversity, and information transfer. Since the site is well integrated in the urban context, which is promised for continued growth, the Site will become what Bill Hillier (professor and researcher of urban morphology in Cambridge) calls a 'Multiplier Effect'. It will also become a data landscape where information can be extracted for research and improvement of planning and building industries. The ultimate goal is for digital/green technology to advance to the point where researchers can develop a method to communicate with Nature (literally). If this is possible, there is certain to be a bounty of information which can be extracted from the Earth.

In the end, it is a platform on which all these stories can take place. It will become prototype for a new type of landscape.

So that's my brief, so far. I'm re-writing it so that it's easier to understand; there definitely be more maps and diagrams to accompany it. I'm quite slow at doing my work because this is something new for me. I'll have more for you later. Take care!

Like a Bowl of Oranges,

Lesley Ann

Getting Up To Speed With "Now"

Dear Reader,

I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. I've also set my myspace profile on Private, so only my friends can read it; sorry about that as well. But if you'd like to read, please just add me as a friend yea? ;)

To get you guys up to speed since my last post- I've finally selected a site for my Major Design Project. It's in London at the Lower Lea Valley in Bow Creek. The Site currently has plans for construction by SOM, but as far as I know they've haulted the project due to lack of funds....the recession, I guess? How IS the economy back at home by the way? I've been so disconnected, living the university world, that the real world seems miles away....

To get back on my MDP, I've decided to take this project on because it's a flood zone and is a gateway to and from the Lea Valley Regional Park. Hence, it will become a park/flood mitigation zone- a point along the River Lea which is distinguished by its meander. In my project, I'm proposing to de-canalize the river and let the landscape evolve naturally, while adding a "pedestrian" layer of boardwalks, stitching the context.

Here's a portion of my Site near the Eco-Park

And another view from Canning Town Tube Station.


In SOM's design, they proposed to build several high-rise residential towers and mixed-use services on podium level. This doesn't seem appropriate to me. Why build high-rises within a flood zone right? Also, why build high rises in a context which has too many unsuccessful projects. To be fair, I know my project would never get built. It requires a long consultation and planning approval process; but it's a paper landscape after all. One is allowed to post a scenario where canalized edges are viable lol! It gets more involved than this, but I'll spare you the details and move forward.

I've been working on this project since last January and so far it's developed well; but I suppose like many designers, I don't feel like I've developed it enough to feel safe. I've got another Crit in less than 2 weeks, and I've got to pick myself up and design like a mad woman! Down to the details no less....which means I'll have to thoroughly figure out my master plan and timescale maps.... I've never done a timescale map before, so I'm a little hesitant to get into it. I know I should be brave and jump into the water, so I've cornered myself by scheduling a photoshoot with Agnes next weekend hahah! I must be insane. It will be fun and refreshing though, because it will be outdoors at the Botanic Gardens. A surreal "Alice" shoot to be exact. I'm totally looking forward to it. Maybe "winging" it in front of the camera will get me to be more confident about "jumping" into my timescale map. That's it! I feel much better about it now. =)

I suppose to make things a bit more interesting, I'm also planning on entering this project into the Forgotten Spaces competition in London. The registration deadline is the 30th of this month, so I've got to get myself moving along. The submission deadline is the 12th of May, which is shortly after our MDP Hand-In. It's going to be an intense next few months. I'd better be ready to do a lot of jumping lol!

Progress in other facets of my career have somewhat gone forward as well. I've been thinking about extending my stay here in the UK, perhaps working for Chora in London for a year. I'm not too sure how it will work out. I've tried contacting Raoul several times whenever I go to London for site visits, but our timetables are like passing ships. We go sailing by silently in a fog hahah! That said, I have several plans- A) work in London or Edinburgh, B) work in Zurich for Gunther Vogt, C) move back to NYC and apply for a job with Terraform ONE or Diana Balmori...maybe even be a teaching assistant at Columbia Uni, D) move back to Cali, apply for work with the government or work with David Fletcher in Northern Cali. I've got too many options, I know; but that's where I stand right now.

I've also been thinking about freelancing again- improving my website, learning Dreamweaver and Flash- and getting gigs especially for Set Design and graphic design..It will just be for little things here and there. Why not right? =) For modeling, I don't know if there's much potential by way of it becoming a major cash flow. It's more like a hobby really; a different form of creative expression which I don't get from architecture to be honest. I'm glad I have both though. They keep me level-headed.

That's all the vital things I have to write about for now. I'll have more to write about as the week goes by. I'm sure I'll have a lot to reflect on as my project develops...maybe I'll even have some sexy graphics to show! How exciting will THAT be? Until then, stay warm, wherever you are; all the best on your endeavours.


Swing low dear chariot,
Lesley Ann

ps: Some inspiration for my design concept. =)

Onward to New Horizons: London, Zurich, and Cybernetics

Dear Reader,

It’s a beautiful day here in London! I just finished mass, lunch, and now I’m sitting here in my flat with the French bay window open; a slight breeze from Finchley Road is flowing through, stirring the curtains. London is buzzing, sirens and babies crying, women clicking the pavement with their Sunday afternoon heels and sundresses. My computer, in some cosmic way, is playing the song “Dust in the Wind” by Kansas. A steaming cuppa sits to my right. Clouds of milk still stir in the amber liquid…..I take a sip. =)

It’s been over a month since I’ve last posted hasn’t it? I guess to begin, much has been going on, and to be honest it’s been quite overwhelming! I first went to Zurich, Switzerland in July for an interview with Gunther Vogt Landscape Architecture. I got the position, however they were looking for an intern that could stay for up to 6 months. Unfortunately, I only needed an internship for the summer, so I had to kindly decline. The good news is I have the option of working in Switzerland if I had the right visa! What an exciting thing- to work in Zurich, the birthplace of Dadaism! So why Switzerland? Gunther Vogt gave a lecture at ECA a few months earlier, and his perspective on design and life absolutely clicked with mine. It dwelled on minimalism for one, however it wasn’t an uncomfortable type of minimalism. Rather, he emphasized spirituality and clarity- reducing clutter in the mind and heart of landscape architecture to create modest, honest, open spaces….holy spaces it felt….like the Swiss Embassy landscape in Berlin, near the Reischstag. The goal of the German government, I suppose in essence, was to focus on redemption and openness. This became real in the architecture (Foster’s Reischstag), the Sony Centre at Potzdamer Platz, and Vogt’s parliament landscape.

I guess another reason why I was so attracted to Switzerland was it’s graphic design- it’s movements in Deconstructivism in Dadaism- the emotional responses to the World Wars made real in their advertisements and package designs. To bring it into modern times, think about the graphics for the band Franz Ferdinand, and to some extent Modest Mouse. That will give you an idea of what I’m talking about. I understand as a designer, it’s probably best to not re-create a style that was appropriate for the epoch it developed, but maybe it’s a starting point? For some reason it is taking me forever to grasp this style, and I’ve tried many ways to study it, maybe even duplicate it to enhance my own personal style of graphic representation. Maybe I’m struggling because I was not raised in the geography of the land it germinated. I grew up in Los Angeles, in a Filipino family, and my visual vocabulary consists mostly of swirls of light, heat, swimming pools, sunsets, movement, and dust.

After my trip to Zurich, and spending a considerable amount of time with my beloved Auntie Nena over there, I’ve decided to put it in my back-pocket and move on. I’m not sad, just curious to know if that will be a direction my life would go. For now, I have London to face.

Now, I’m in London because I’m interning for Raoul Bunschoten at Chora Architecture and Urbanism in Camden/Kentish Town. This direction is incredible as well, and probably loaded with more purpose, because my goal is to do more research on the Thames Gateway which will be the focus of my Major Design Project at ECA. There will be a considerable amount of focus on the regeneration of the Thames, especially in East London, close to the location of the 2012 Olympics. Also, since this will be my last year in the UK, I’m hoping to make it a good one (that is unless I can either stay a year longer for an art degree or working visa….more on that later…). One of my schoolmates, Liva, helped me get the position, and I’m eternally grateful. I’ve also met so many wonderful characters here- Helene Binet, Raoul’s wife, is one of the most talented architectural photographers I’ve had the pleasure of meeting. She’s always having volunteers and interns walking in and out of her office (upstairs from the Chora office); and the interesting thing is some aren’t even photographers. Some are junior high school students, interested in art and/or photography. Some are architecture undergrads, friends of the family, or relatives, all pitching in to help her develop film, organize stock, and archive files. Quite simple work actually, but it makes me wonder if I could lend her a hand as well…..hmmmm….

Now, I’ve been working for Raoul for roughly 3 weeks. His method of thinking and design is completely different from what I’m accustomed to. He developed his thesis, from my understanding, through the work of Gordon Pask on cybernetics. I really can’t tell you what cybernetics is about because I’ve just recently begun to understand it (quite literally 3 days ago). However, if I were to give it my best, at least for Raoul’s thesis, it does happen to touch on the idea that creation, urbanism, and all that is material is static, unorganized, and constantly in flux. Design, whether it’s a building, a landscape, or a city, must accommodate this by providing a flexible structure, a place for growth, on the micro and macro levels, and definitely in the scale of the human being….

In another angle, by which I’ve begun to understand his thesis, Raoul emphasizes on the need to help the actors or stakeholders in an urban environment of study (he calls them “Sectors”, or if given a smaller/specific site, a “Prototype”), more aware of self-sustainability, and the power they have to make a positive change in the environment. It also touches on economics and “non-structural” systems, such as the unfolding of time, that would bring about change and the development of an existing urban environment; the key actors or stakeholders in these environments would be the participants in its design; therefore the architect is not designing the city, but rather its participants. For example, Greenwich Village in New York was first designed as a small/medium-scaled, residential, pedestrian-friendly neighborhood before the invention of the auto-mobile. The people who lived there were middle-working class New Englanders. They maintained an “average” lifestyle, and the neighborhood during its time, was very much “average”. As the rest of New York developed into a modern metropolis, Greenwich Village has maintained its physical character, or rather resisted the changes brought by the unfolding of time, by the dynamics between key actors such as the war between Jane Jacobs, Robert Moses, and the City of New York. Greenwich Village resisted physical/urban fabric changes as time unfolded, and but the people who live there now, the user-group of its “new” design, and presented by Jane Jacob’s influence, are grassroots activists, artists, environmentalists, and the city’s elite. It’s a jewel in the City of New York, because very few small-scaled neighborhoods exist within Manhattan.

With this case-study in mind, Raoul is creating an awareness, designing (“teaching” as a way to put it), the minds of students, stake-holders, architects, and other actors in emerging environments (aka: “Sectors”, like “Sector T”- for the Thames, the environment I’m doing research on), about the ways of sustainability, renewable energy, and so forth. Jane Jacobs knew Greenwich Village needed to be preserved, not only because she lived there, but also because of its people and it’s potential to become a beacon of sustainable growth in a city that was losing its history. This is what I’m doing for Raoul as I continue to study the Thames Gateway.

If you were to read any of his books, dear Reader, you would be quite confused. The language, or perhaps jargon used in his thesis uses metaphors, prose, or even iconography to describe an idea because, given the constant flux of urbanism, a taxonomic name would be too specific, and perhaps inaccurate. For example, how do we label a person, or a cause, or the existence of an object, if it’s constantly changing, or the perception of it is different from one person or being, to the next? I’m quite certain Jane Jacobs didn’t know she was helping with the design outcome of Greenwich, nor Robert Moses….However, I’m quite certain they had feelings involved as they participated in saving or changing New York. How would you place a label on a feeling? More so, how would you label Jane Jacobs? She wasn’t an architect, she didn’t have a college degree; she was a journalist, and maybe a shaper, but she wasn’t creating the Greenwich Village we see today….it already existed. Its perception has merely changed, and it’s method was the unfolding of time, through the hand of key actors or agents, a non-structural method of design...somehow Time choreographed it into a Metacity…..

This way of thinking has given me more direction, because quite often I would think or create a design that can’t be given a label; and quite often I would feel disappointed in myself for not knowing what to name it….For example, I designed a garden for a veterinary hospital in Edinburgh…but it’s name- a “Healing Garden”- didn’t seem quite right, and if I called it a “Space for Change”, or a “Space in Flux”, people would not understand it. In a way, branding it would be false, because there are so many ways to use the so-called “Garden” that I designed; and locking it with a label would restrict it to a specific use. At the end of the project timeline, I called it a “Healing Garden” because that was the best way for me to “sell” it to our Client. It was a bit frustrating, but maybe at the end of the day, I just had to settle.

Raoul’s way of thinking makes me feel happy- that it’s ok to leave things out in the open, to develop in its own. If you set a stage for the actors and players to do their own thing, you are doing enough as an architect or a designer; and most often you know you’re doing this out of love, at least to your best ability. For the larger picture, however, I’m still struggling on creating a method to communicate this concept in a simple and concrete format. I definitely could not teach it in a few sentences.....Yet, Raoul was able to win the hearts of Ken Yeang, Zaha Hadid, Eeclo Hooftman, and REM Koolhaas. Maybe it’s because they think like him…maybe it’s because they’ve known him for a long time, and therefore had the time to develop a history of communication among themselves. It’s incredible…..

All things considered, Raoul currently teaches in Dusseldorf, and also is a professor here for the London Metropolitan University. He’s also worked with the Architectural Association and the Bartlett (I think), so there’s loads of research done on his part. He’s also written quite a number of books including his thesis book: “Urban Flotsam”. I have the prototype book here, sitting so comfortably on my desk, with post-it notes all over it. =)

So here we are again, returning from the depths of cybernetics, London, and Swiss Dadaism. “Dust in the Wind” has transformed into “Heaven” by Lamb. The window is closed, my tea is cold, and I just inhaled the last gulp. I’m going to make more though, and accompany it with a few biscuits, because it’s 4pm; and as we all know, in Britain 4pm is officially Tea Time! I hope you enjoyed this read- I definitely did. It brought light to so many issues that have been floating around in my head; and I think I will enjoy my cuppa knowing I could return to work tomorrow with more peace of mind. I’ll keep you posted of more changes. Until then, enjoy the rest of your summer! =)


Love in the Clouds,
Lesley Ann

....it is not constant

Dear Reader,

I feel my life will change dramatically this year. It's difficult to describe, but I've already taken action is so many areas- pursuit of my landscape architecture degree, a recent visit to Zurich, Switzerland for an interview in Gunther Vogt's office, and now I will be spending most of my summer researching on climate change, improving my graphic skills, and locating a project site for next term. I've yet to find one and really can't decide between north-eastern Europe and Asia. This year is going to be exhausting and challenging! Also, I've been itching to improve in other hobbies- singing (yes I know, but really I've always wanted to try hahaha), learning how to play the guitar (again), and modeling. I'm not particularly gifted in any of these. I just find that they balance my life so well when I spend time on them. Thankfully though, I wouldn't find enjoyment in these hobbies without my purpose for being in the UK- to get my second degree in Landscape Architecture, to one day teach, and become a stronger, more active professional. To reflect on all these developments so far, I've experienced a new understanding of the words "Change", "Consistency", and "Identity".

Speaking of being more professional, I have a new addition to my summer reading list- The Reflective Practitioner: How Professionals Think in Action by Donald A. Schon. I was reminded to borrow this from the ECA library when I was re-reading the comments my studio professor wrote when she finished grading my performance. She noted that I should try to relax and observe the world around me....to breathe, meditate, and not work so hard all the time....and by doing so, naturally this new input will make an impression on my ability to improve my designs. Landscape is very different from architecture. Yet, I find this advice would have been helpful when I was at USC. Maybe my designs wouldn't have looked so Brutalistic. In the end of my first year, I didn't have the grade I had expected, despite all my hard work. It was quite lower. I would have argued against it, but something in my gut told me to suspend my actions and LISTEN. I'm ok at understanding what people tell me, but I have a difficult time heeding advice. If it doesn't suit me, or function with my plans, it's quite difficult to swallow. I know this happens to the best of us; I guess it's been a while since I've had such precise (in some areas), and (in others) strangely vague, constructive criticism....

After a few hours of reading The Reflective Practitioner, I've realized that I don't want to return it after my three-day loan period. I'll have to buy a copy. Thinking about my professor's comments, I felt sheepish of my initial reaction to be defensive (and at times offensive). I'm glad I didn't do anything about it. This book fully explains the ambiguities of her writing. I think I have, indeed, been unaware of the tremendous responsibility I have as a new professional and future instructor to take time out of my "industrious" and "hard-working" vacuum, away from honing my graphic and technical skills which will soon become obsolete anyway, so I could rightfully spend my time building up my foundations. Learning how to learn, how to think, how to observe the "now". What's going on in the world today? What are its problems? What advances have been made in fields beside my own that are currently affecting global issues? How do I respond to it? What role do I play?? What messes are out there that I play a part in managing? We are not disconnected and the world is not constant. I'm no longer considered a professional if I'm not up to date with an understanding of my field. Again, I felt naive to put more time in "seductive" graphics.

As a final thought, I truly feel my interests in design are slowly shifting. They still respond to issues of global warming and hands-on practice/technique; However, I've come to experience that after reading a few articles listed in my previous post and today's book, that learning Rhino and another tool in AutoCAD or Sketchup is less significant than understanding how, when, and why I do what I do. How do we accept that global warming is all part of a cycle? What sort of research and practice can be done to adapt to these changes? When will research catch up with technology, and when will the construction industry catch up? Why am I getting a post-graduate degree? For me, it's important to do my best not lead the client, the construction team, all the consultants, and even my contemporaries down well-worn paths when I know the world never truly stays still. However, with all things considered, I could never call myself a professional.



What is the "Fittest"?
Lesley Ann